Monday, January 17, 2011

A letter for you

I miss you.  I'm sad all the time that you won't be here to play with my future kids.  I hope you're teaching them all you know now.  I look at all the pictures of you with the other kids and know mine will be missing something great.  It makes me so sad I didn't have much time to get to know you.  I sometimes feel like I just always need to be the strong one it's not me who should really be the sad one.  I only knew you about a year and the least of anyone else.  But I find myself looking at pictures and videos often, wondering about you and crying.  I see the hurt and sadness in his eyes sometimes although he tries to be strong and happy.  I know that will never fully go away.  He needs his brothers.  I only ever had a brother growing up so sisters I was nervous for when it came to family.  Brothers I was excited for! Brothers I knew how to handle.  But I was wrong, I don't know how to handle you being gone and not getting to know you and well.... it breaks my heart.  I just wanted to say Hi and we miss you. You probably already know that but I like writing things down.  I always have.  You'd laugh at every unfinished novel or story I have. dating back to Jr. high times. but I'm sticking to one and I hope it works out.  we're good and mostly happy :) we'll love you forever.

Andrea

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