I really try to keep most my work life off this blog. I think. I'm not sure I do a great job of it. I've also tried to be more positive here. But here's the thing. Today I need to vent. Today I need to get somethings out.
My job has been great to me. I get paid really good. I mostly like doing what I do. But lately.... I don't know. I hate never seeing the hubs because I work weekends and he doesn't. I hate working holidays. and there are A LOT of unfair things happening. A LOT! Which I'm for sure not getting into on this blog because its a highly unprofessional way to deal with it all. So moving on...
I read recently that having friends where you work is crucial to happiness in the work place. And not to offend anyone I work with who may read it, but I don't really have friends at work. I have one person I get along with very well and for the most part consider a friend... that's one... one person in the midst of... getting off subject. Going back. I like my Boss. I think he's a great guy. So lets make a people I like at work list. there are 2 people on it. And one of them is my boss. You can't always like your boss. sometimes they have to be the boss and enforce that you work every weekend and holiday which you hate. It comes from his boss. So you can't always like your boss. UGH I'm rambling I know but this is how my thoughts are in my head right now.
When was the last time I was truly 100% happy at work? When I was just a peon at AMC. When I was surrounded by friends and people I loved being around. It's the whole reason I got sucked into the theater business. Its been different at the company I now work for. I can't say I never had friends. I used to have some, I guess. But they've either quit or we've had things come between us whether it be work politics or family issues or they've gone to other locations or jobs where I just don't see them as much.. Whatever... I am where I am... and where I am is Stuck.
I make too much money to qualify for grants for school. I don't make enough money to pay for school on my own. I have too many fanical responsibilities to take much of a paycut. I make too much money to quit and find soemthing I'd like better. I don't make enough money to work every weekend and holiday and play happy about it. it's a never ending cycle. I screwed up and wasted my high school days when I could've been getting schooling for free that I would die to get now. If I could do the Job I'm in now monday- friday 9-5 I'd be a lot happier. I think the hours are my biggest issue. but I'm just not sure any more.
They say you can decide how to feel about something. maybe thats true but its hard to love something you're learning so fast to hate. I guess I better try beacuse I'm not so sure what else to do. I hope it works.
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