The Fear

So far through out my pregnancy I haven't been scared of what's to come at the end. I've been excited to hold my little one and have this experience. Everyone asks me if I'm scared and I've honestly been able to answer that I'm not. Every night I have to get up about 700 times to pee, its a little insane. And a lot of the time it takes me a really long time to fall back asleep, I'm just getting that no sleep practice in I suppose. And last night about 2 am was the first time I had any real anxiety about labor. I still don't want to call it fear but I had about 15 minutes of "Oh my goodness I have to push this ever growing human out of a very small space!"  

I think this fear was brought about because things are changing fast now. With my son gaining at least 1/2 a pound a week now, things leaking that have never had a purpose before, the back pains, and occasional Braxton Hicks contractions, it's all becoming a little more real.   I only have 7 weeks left. 7 weeks to make sure everything at work is taken care of, 7 weeks to make sure I have everything needed for baby (Which I don't even know everything I need!!). 

On one hand I'm ready to be done with all that.  On the other I feel like there is so much left to do.  The anxiety has calmed down a bit again.  But it makes me laugh how the closer I get the more people tell me how much it hurts, followed by breastfeeding horror stories. Thanks love you all:)  I guess I'll be more prepared, or I'll just think I am and it will be worse than I think! LOL really I'm quite excited for my son to get here all in all.